-We love marriage just as much as we love weddings. Take a moment to prepare not just for the wedding, but for the marriage–
Before we got married I looked over the vows and meditated on them, I wanted to make sure I really meant everything I was saying. Do other people do this? I don’t know but marriage is a lifetime commitment so when I do something like that I don’t just want the photography and the flowers to be perfect I want my heart to be in the perfect place too. I had thought a lot about the words, “in sickness and in health” before our engagement. What life would be like if Paul was very sick and I had to take care of him along with all the other normal duties all by myself. I decided it is something I would do if we were ever found in that position, it would be hard but I could do it. I made the decision to love my husband-to-be ahead of time. Now, almost 3 years later we’re settled into married life and while Paul is not seriously ill, he has been pretty sick. I’ve been doing most of his chores in addition to mine, cooking dinner and cleaning up after dinner, you get the idea. It’s been very tiring. Fortunately he is feeling much better now that he is on some antibiotics, but sometimes I found myself getting frustrated and upset at Paul because he should have been helping me, right? I shouldn’t have to do everything by myself! I got disrespectful or treated him coldly. It was tough, especially since we weren’t sure what was affecting him for those two weeks. But of course, if I just took a minute to look deeper I would have realized something; yes, it is hard, but that is not Paul’s fault. It’s no one’s fault. Its just the way it is. And really, It’s OK to be frustrated, that can bring so many good things – thankfulness for the work my husband does on a daily basis, admiration for those who take care of someone who is chronically ill, and even inspiration to lend a hand to a friend in need. But instead of seeing all that I was just feeling sorry for myself, forgetting that its not all about me. Sometimes I get lost in my own self-centered little world, but I am so glad to be married because it means I have a husband I love who unknowingly draws me out of myself and inspires me to love and to live out our vows.
*Carolyn
The above photo is of Meredith and Kevin, if you would like to see more photos from Meredith and Kevin’s wedding click here.
